Saturday, December 18, 2010

ESL Dating Reply #6

I am starting to think that all I have to do is reply, just say anything and I will get a reply back from this one. I thought I already tested the waters when I told her that things like implants and a huge bank account are important qualities in the woman I am dating. If this reply doesn't work, I might just keep it going for awhile, all in the name of comedy. I usually don't even get a reply after I send them a bad English reply of my own, so three from the same woman is just plain weird.
Maybe next I should just send her a random collection of words? That's pretty much what she sends me, so why not? Of course, I haven't even factored in the possibility that she might be an actual person, and she's falling for me in spite of my bad English, but for now, I will just assume she's a spammer and she's going to ask me for $1000 in about a week.

Dear Dan!
A thank for this e-mail from you, your messages really pleasant me. This week is present new theme for reflections, and these new ideas excite me. I do not know as you, Dan but for me begins to have importance our exchange e-mail. It is new emotions in my quiet heart. For me it is not usual, to get acquainted with the man on e-mail, behind many miles from me and it is possible to have the relation. I did not inform to you earlier Dan the address, because it is not enough knew you. I live in average area of Russia, in city Kazan.
To it far from you, differently to us was not necessary for a regret much e-mail, to learn each other. We could meet, talk, to carry out some time together and not bad to learn each other. But for us it will be not a fast way. But I hope, that it will not be problem for us, if we shall decide to do it in the future. I already made some travels to other countries. I traveled, as the tourist, in Europe; it is Turkey, Italy, Germany.
Therefore, Dan, you should not have excitements that is present distance between us. I such woman, that if I shall love the man, for meeting with it, I shall reach even on the moon. In our days is a problem to make such travels. I not worry about it and even have devoted feelings, having got acquainted with by the man on the other hand. For me it is very interesting feelings - to learn the man with other culture, thinking, traditions. It one of things - which draws me to you. Not the main thing, - but new and interesting. Probably if our relations will be strong and you Dan, can learn the mysterious Russian woman. I hope, that for you it is interesting to learn and to test love of such woman? I think, road Dan, that you can not long resist to mine female magic, if happen so, that we shall be person to the person. On it I finish my message to you Dan. I wait for your messages.

Yours Olga.

Here’s where I start pushing the jokes a little too far.

Deer Olga!
Repeated thanking from email of yours, your message is pleasant made me as well. You were saying it is new emotions in quiet heart of yours? What emotions new is it? Often I do find me causing the laughs, but that mostly when I view myself in mirror. For me also it is unusual not to get acquainted with persons on computer, but closeness it is made obstacle by distance behind me for meeting of the woman.
Thanking from me at you for telling to me of city location of you, I knew not of your living at Kazan. Far from me it is, but love to see it someday would I. I am glad it is now enough knew me to you home city disclosure for me. I concur it is not bad to learn each other, I of you will love to do learn, you can learn me anything. I would love to do a meeting in days of the future, but financials prevention would obstacle create. I am not A lot of money earning while in school, so flying will not be optional for distant amounts of time, unless I grow my own wings.
I have not traveled by the wings since age 13, when plane was stopped by the terrorists and we went to Cuba. I will say it was nice, but we wanted to go to happy sunny Florida instead. I guess I can say I traveled as the hostage to foreign country, but I haven't voluntarily gone to foreign country since the age of 5. The last time of flight was traumatic, but therapist says continue with pills and weekly visits, it will be under good control.
I do not have great excitements of present distance creating the gap between us, I simply caution in meeting of people so distant from my location. Each occasion of mine making acquaintance with the far away woman it is deleted in both of us sorrowed for me not having money for plane ticket of her. I am at least grateful for you not having to fly to moon, for I that far away am not, and how impossible that is?
Interested I am in learning the mysterious Russian woman, I am fascinated by Russia and Russian culture. Trying to learn your language was hard, but give up does not I, for I don't quit until I win. In event that you the Russian woman did make the arrival in this place, I will admit difficulties I would have to give resistance to your female magic. For you to victory of me, you only have to get me into bed, and then we would be person to the person.
I must say I am really enjoying this, I cannot to wait that I heard from you again!

Dan

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